Self Sabotage No More, The Blog

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Did I Mention that I Had Never Spoken on Stage?

October 02, 20234 min read

Someone asked me the other day if they wanted to speak on stages what should they do…

More specifically; What did I do?

I smiled and said; “well for me, it was God's favor.”
Literally, God's hand was in every moment from the opportunity to speak on my first stage to the last stage I spoke on.

"Yeah… But what did you do?"

I went on to share a story of how time after time I said yes when opportunity arose that scared me. Quite a few years ago, I flew all the way to Alabama to do a presentation to sell some packages for someone interested in the product I represented. It worked well because there was a company event I wanted to attend just a few hours from there in Nashville and so I figured I could hop on a greyhound and head to the event after my presentation.

I was very nervous back in those days. Everything made me sweat, (like right through my clothes kind of sweat) but I was always forcing myself to do the hard stuff.

At the presentation in Alabama I sold 22 packages on the spot and broke a company record.

The next day in Nashville after a sweat inducing greyhound ride, I walked down the hallway of the stadium sized hotel. I was a bit nervous as I knew almost no one, I turned the corner and  ran smack into the owner of the company I had sold the packages for. He looked at me and said
Jennie Potter in a matter of fact, full stop, kind of way. I said OMG I'm so excited to see you! He asked; "have you eaten dinner?"

 I said no! (I would have said no even if I had eaten a buffet 3 minutes earlier) 

 He said; "let me buy you dinner and find out how you sold 22 packages and broke a company record yesterday."

Full body sweats and over the moon excited we headed for the hotel restaurant...

To have the opportunity to sit with one of the greats, someone I respected and admired so much was a once in a lifetime opportunity. 

After we discussed my sales "pitch success" the conversation, turned to what I was dreaming of.
He asked; “what do you want for your life?"

I blurted; “I want to speak on stage at convention!” Red faced… I went onto say that I KNEW it was too late to be a speaker for this years convention but one day I wanted to be on stage…

Did I mention I had never spoken on a stage?

I continued awkwardly… “I know there's no reason for me to speak on stage this year, I know I haven't done enough, I know I haven't proven myself, but I have this sinking feeling like I'm supposed to be on stage and I’m not fulfilling my destiny!”

I literally spoke out loud what had been on my heart for the last month. That I was missing my calling.

He leaned back, looked at me as if to assess what I had just said, and then with a wry smile, acted on a prompting.

“Jennie I want you to speak on stage tomorrow at the event.”

I'll give you 15 minutes.

My face probably went from red to white as I processed.  I had been given my chance but what would I say? I might die…

It was 10 at night. Way past my bedtime.
I prayed a prayer as my head hit the pillow, God please give me the words tomorrow, and I went to sleep.

In the morning, God showed me a story.

God showed me my past broken self.

God showed me the self that spoke into the mirror all those years ago.

God reminded me of the words that changed my destiny.

I'm beautiful.
I love myself.
I'm worthy of love.

God showed me the beginning of how I had turned things around.

He reminded me how I went from broken to healed, he invited me to share.

And that morning in Nashville, share I did.

I got my 15 minutes. I heard my name, I walked up to the 🎤mic and I shared how I went from broken to healed. How I went from, broke to abundant, I shared how anyone can heal with God, with affirmations, with self love, and the power of words.

For the first time I spoke out my I AM speech and that was the beginning.

Divine timing, a willingness to say yes and a deep desire to live my purpose.

God guided my every step that day and still guides my every step today.

There was pain in the memory as I recounted this story.

But big love too.

There has been loss since then, lessons since then, gain since then.

I have seen behind curtains I never wanted to see behind, and I have grown beyond those curtains.  Learning to lean more deeply on God, to seek Him first and to love myself more.

There are still many stages to say yes to. Still much to overcome, but the difference now is realizing the moments behind the curtain, leading up to the stage are even more important than my 15 minutes.

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Jennie Potter

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